The New Mantra That Keeps Your Sanity

There may be a version of "okay" that you have been chasing ever since the divorce proceedings started, and it looks like this: the divorce is finalised, your children are settled, you find a place that feels like home and the job is secure.

Then you'll be okay.

Then you can breathe.

Then you'll be ready.

This is where I challenge my clients' beliefs: waiting until everything is "fixed" before you allow yourself to feel okay is not a strategy. It's a trap.

In life, our goalposts keep moving. You get through one thing and another thing surfaces. The visa question gets sorted and then the custody conversation starts. You stop crying at work and then a student asks where your husband is and you nearly lose it in the corridor.

There will always be a reason why now is not the time to be okay.

The Ground-Shaking Truth

Your students don't need you to be perfect. They need you to be present.

Your child doesn't need you to have it all figured out. She needs you to show up.

Your job doesn't need you to be exceptional right now. It needs you to be steady.

There is a difference between perfect and good enough. Good enough is not settling. It is not giving up. It is not weakness. It is the most intelligent thing you can do.

Think about it the way you think about your classroom. When a child is going through something hard at home, you don't expect them to produce their best work. You look for signs that they are coping. You celebrate the fact that they came in. You notice that they tried.

Give yourself the same grace you give your students.

What Does "Good Enough" Look Like?

It looks like getting through the school day without breaking down. It looks like making a decent meal for your children even when you're exhausted. It looks like sending that one email you've been putting off. It looks like getting out of bed when everything in you wants to pull the covers over your head and disappear.

These are not trivial things. This is survival. In fact, it is extraordinary.

You don't have to be healed to be okay. You don't have to be over it to move forward. You just have to keep going, one ordinary day at a time.

The New Mantra

Good enough is the new perfect.

What this means is the version of you that shows up imperfectly, tired, a little bit broken and still trying, is a version that is more than enough. Even when you take a little break and don't show up at work - that's okay, because you're showing up for yourself.

Say it like a mantra. Write it on a Post-it and stick it to your bathroom mirror. Say it before you step out the door every morning.

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If you're ready to feel okay again, I'd love to talk. DM me.